And they have all ended DISASTROUSLY, but I couldn’t stop doing it. Mostly because I’m optimistic, I think, this time will be different, I really like this person. But also, because if you’re around me a lot, you naturally become part of my life in friendship or otherwise (laws of proximity). I don’t think there’s anything wrong with dating customers, but be prepared for things to not work out and seeing them hanging around your shift because that’s what they were doing before you dated - super awkward!! I think it takes a special person to date a bartender. We collect a lot of customer phone numbers and add them to our instagrams and facebook, not normal in an office! We socialize for a living, we flirt, we entertain, we get people drunk, it’s what we do. Our partners need to be confident in themselves and recognize that it’s just a job (and sometimes it’s not, so that doesn’t help - sorry). My point is, dating customers has benefits. You kind of get to know the person as a friend before any kind of relationship outside the bar ensues. Sometimes, that person is always on their best behavior when they visit you and they’re NOTHING like that in their personal life This is true in real life for early dating as well, even when they were never your bar customer, so keep that in mind. If they drank regularly, 1 or 2 drinks on your shift, don’t be surprised if they drink WAY MORE than you thought in their personal life. Also, don’t be surprised if they start hinting you should be doing something else for a living (so they can keep you all to themselves and a new customer can’t sweep you away like they did).
Here are my suggestions: If you’re going to date a customer, set some ground rules, boundaries and expectations, like any relationship. A great boundary line in this case is: Never allow that person to come visit you on your shift again. Ever. Significant others should NEVER be allowed on your shift, regardless of how you met. It takes your attention away from customers and becomes a distraction and brings potential drama into your work place - don’t do it. It’s also important for your new customer turned significant other to understand that customers do become friends, so freaking out over text messages is a no no (unless you’re exchanging sexy photos, this might be grounds to get upset). Every case is different and the rules will be unique to the circumstances, but tread carefully. I now prefer to meet my dates outside my work life.
HAVE YOU EVER DATED A CUSTOMER? HOW DID THAT WORK OUT? I would love to feature your story! Hey@StartenderApp.com